Step 3 at my AA meeting ...Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

 
I always believed in God and truly believe that everything happens for a reason.    This is a tough step for me because living in accordance to God's Will is very confusing at times.   How do we know when we are doing something selfishly or for God?  How do we let go of wanting the things we want in our lives and allow God to take over?  

I've questioned my Spirituality for many years now.  I've always seem to be lacking it.  I've always wondered how to get more of it.  I've always believed that God's been with me along my journey in life, through my hard times and not.  He sends me messages often.   

I think that when my mind was in a fog, with alcohol, I was too busy to wonder what God wanted me to do that day.   I was so busy and obsessed with drinking that I missed a lot of the special moments God sent my way on a daily basis.... those stolen moments...for example...as I type right now, my son has his hand resting on the back of my neck.... my moment. 

I want to focus on this Step for a few weeks.  I will start my morning, my well rested morning, with the Serenity Prayer.   I will ask God to guide me.   I will let Him take over, take the wheel.   I will concentrate on the special moments in my life and be so grateful for the chance to see them...to feel them.....

  

The Book says we need one thing to focus on Step 3:  Willingness

I can tell you, with all the shit I've been through, including the relapse last week, I'm willing to do anything to stay here, where I am today. sober and free.

From the book:

Step Three calls for affirmative action, for it is only by action that we can cut away the self-will which has always blocked the entry of God— or, if you like, a Higher Power—into our lives.